A is for Alpha.. redefining spelling

When you’ve worked in Dubai for as long as I have .. 6000 years and counting.. or was it 4, I don’t know, it all seems the same at this point, you pick up on some crazy communication strategies.

Dubai being as multi cultured as it is ( very very multi cultured), we find it hard to sometimes understand what the other person is saying, so it seems the workforce has made it their mission to reinvent the English language and assign new words to the alphabets ( because you know the words we learnt in primary school weren’t good enough)….

For your consideration.. or it is for your reference..

A  is for Alpha, not for Apple, or Amsterdam
B is for Bombay, never ball and definitely not basic
C is for Cat, which is of course becoming the universal symbol of the world
D is for Dubai.. because you know we are in Dubai and logic
E is Easter ..maybe no one wanted to put too much effort in redefining E
F is for Freight.. (logistics people)
G is for Germany ( I know)
H is for House
I is for Island
J for Jebel Ali ( lots of geographic names)
K for Kuwait ..never Kite or anything normal like key, or kangaroo
L for Limca or Logistics ( again logistics people)
M is for Manila ( like the Capital of Philipines) or Mumbai
N is Netherlands ( we are all into country names)
O is for Oscar.. everywhere and anywhere you go, O is always Oscar, you can change every there letter and every other word, but it is unforgivable to change O…
P is for  Philippines
Q is for Queen.. ofcourse, we have a hard time coming up with any  other simpler word
R is for Ras Al Khaimah
S is for Sharjah
T is for Taxi.. never Terminal ( I wonder why)
U is for Umm al Quwain
V is for Victory… just like O for Oscar, V is always always always Victory
W is for Water
X .. we struggle with this one.. its always X is for X.. no one has  a good word for this letter
Z same as X we struggle with this one too, to add to the confusion, no one ever knows whether the pronunciation is ZEE or ZED, ( we just make it up as you go with this letter)

 

So imagine a conversation between me and a guy named Alwin

Me : So can I speak with the concerned person
Alwin : That’s me, Alpha, Limca, Water, Island, Netherlands- Alwin
Me : Oh Hi Alwin, did you say it was Apple, logistics, Wage, Ice, Nice ?
Alwin : No No,  wait let me say it again.. its Alpha, Limca, Water Island, Netherlands – A.L.W.I.N.
Me : Right thank you, can I have your email ID ( dreading this question)
Alwin : sure its its Alpha, Limca, Water Island, Netherlands dot Oscar Oscar Victory, Sharjah @ Easter manila queen alpha cat ….

By this time my minds already drifted away, but I am really thankful that landline calls are free.. imagine doing this via Mobile

It never gets easier, even after the 6000-5996 years that I’ve been working, it hasn’t become any easier, and I’ve post it notes of people’s names all over my table to proof how hard it is.
Its easier when people give you their names though, its harder when you have to give yours, each time, mid spelling I tend to forget my own name, or wish I had a shorter name or start thinking of the last time I drank Limca.. Its all very exhausting..

My only hope is that never in the foreseeable future I will never have to spell Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious, because that would just be plain torture and truthfully there aren’t enough post its for that.

Guess I better go to work now
Have a great Water Easter Easter Kuwait Easter Netherlands Dubai

Heres to the worklife and ofcourse MR. Alpha, Limca, Water Island, Netherlands
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