Follow the lines.
A long time ago, at the ago of 10 ( it really isn’t that long a time ago), In school, I had to leave any hope of being in Art Class. The teacher was this really artistic serious about her stuff kind of person. She had these specific requirements, and we couldn’t afford to buy the art supplies, I dropped out.
And chose Dance. WORST.DECISION.OF MY LIFE. after 6+ years of learning”synchronized” dancing, I am as graceful as a stone. I can freestyle though. In the Dark, With no one around.
I don’t regret not being able to take art classes, because at the time there wasn’t much I could do, but also these are the instances that have shaped my life. It turns out when things are handed to you, you don’t value it as much as you do when you have to actually work hard for it.
And I did. Nights and days, I worked at it.
But since it is not related to grades or career performance, no one really gave it a second glance, I had to be my own cheerleader, that worked for me, because I didn’t need approval, I already had the conviction, and the desire.
God Blessed me with that. That was all that I needed.
I remember reading Sketching for Dummies, and I never really got past the first 10 pages, because the first couple of pages had all the advice I needed : Follow The Lines.
I have come to love sketching, the thought a blank page, pencils and an idea and image before me, unfolding as pencil makes contact with the page.
Its using your hands, spending all that time and focus on a single blank page, drawing, erasing and starting again, there is no count to how many times I have erased and started afresh. Maybe that’s the only way to progress, find out why it wont work, scrap it all and begin again.
It taught me a whole lot of patience and getting over anxiety. Anytime I start, I keep going until I am halfway till completion and then the thought strikes me that crap this is horrible and I am never going to be able succeed, that’s it not going to look right.
This has happened so many times, I almost wait for this moment to come, simply because that is the decisive moment, it could crush you or just propel you forward. It is at that point that I understand what needs to be changed, what needs to be erased. Almost always I will have to erase all that I have drawn and start afresh. I am yet to attempt drawing from Memory, it is still going to take me a whole lot time at effort to get there.
There used to be a time, where I could only draw at night, when everyone was sleeping. It was only at that time that I could get into the Zone. My Parents always asked ” would it be to much to ask, for you to be zoned in at a much acceptable hour, like 7 in the morning?”.
Being a big fan of the LOTR , Its been my dream to draw Ian Mckellen’s Gandalf. , I always thought it was going to be a challenge, and to an extent it was. It wasn’t until I actually got around to it, that it became much easier. Sometimes the thought is more intimidating than the action.
And here it is. I really like how it finally turned out.
It could be better, but I am still learning, still understanding, still working to be better the next time, for now I am happy with my Gandalf.
Here’s to the good things that won’t let you sleep.